When thinking of salvation you draw on the old Smith Barney commercial (i.e., "We get to heaven the old fashioned way…. We earn it!")
You think "Amazing Grace" refers to someone's girlfriend.
You think the whole fuss about original sin is just sinfully wrong-headed.
Simply hearing the name Augustine makes you break out in a rash.
You think "propitiation" is something that happens to your heart when you over-exert yourself.
The Beatles song which goes, "one two three four ...